Updated: Jul 30
Lately my mind is full of exhaustion; as if my brain has been dragging itself along the walls of my skull trying to stay awake. I find myself constantly trying to schedule time to do all the things that bring me energy; however energy is the last thing in my tank. So, to pull myself up for a workout or even just pick up this IPad to write a post... has felt like a chore. There is nothing overwhelming to me than feeling out of touch. Working from home has been a blessing, trust me I’m extremely grateful for the opportunity. However, it does have its downsides. In the beginning working from home felt nice but as the weeks went on, working from home almost felt intrusive. Being in my room for 8 hours on the computer leaves me with no desire to open up another electronic for the rest of the day (unless it´s my Switch to play some Animal Crossing lol).
My room which is my sacred little hideout, has also turned into my work space. Believe it or not there is a mix of energy in here. Your girl is constantly using Palo Santo in the AM and PM. I love my job don´t get me wrong but its been hard to even write a post to distress. As much as I try to keep it organized around here, when I look over at my desk filled with paper work, I cringe. I have thought about moving my work downstairs but with all the noise during the day, its probably not the best idea for these Zoom meetings. I might turn into a meme or video of the day with my loud hispanic family.
Safe to say this pandemic has effected every single one of us regardless of race, sex, age, capability; the list is goes on. A period in time we will never forget. Also a period in time where I thought working from home would be fire, but the only thing on fire is my brain. Come to think of it, it was nice to go into work and leave work at work. In social work (or any job really) its so important to cut ties after your shift or the burn out can leave you with some third degree mental burns.
So I am writing to you all who might be going through something similar. Please , please, please do not punish yourself for taking a break from life. This does not make you lazy or unmotivated. You are simply giving your spirit time to recharge. Too much of anything can be counter productive and for me at least that even includes the things I love. I am realizing that just because I indugle in video games one week or a well-being novel the next; this won´t stray me off path. Working a ‘9-5‘ and trying to making your passion a source of income someday takes time, so just enjoy the present moment because that all you really have.
I stopped overthinking and decided to just type...